It's Time to Have a Conversation

We all have so much to say ... all bubbling inside
just beneath the surface... fluttering its wings
making different sounds... inaudible to people around
all we need is, someone... who will listen without
judging, without thinking... and saying things.

A funny thing about conversations once you start, it requires a great self-control to hit a pause button. Introverts and extroverts are well established in their societal territories and they carry on with their lives in their respective comfort zones. Actual victims are the ones, like me, who fall somewhere in between the whole personality spectrum. At times I'm babbling my tongue out making all possible sounds and gestures and then there are times when I find myself looking for nooks and corners so that I can stand in silence, pretending to seek solace and enjoying the perks being a wallflower. But, after a while my mood swings. Damn, it always does.

I'm a good listener. That's what I think of myself. I act like an absorbent, I try, taking it all inside and not leaking it along the fringes. I think I can save it all, stash it and forget it. That's what friends do and that's what I think is right. Suddenly I find myself browsing people around, looking for a kind ear, a listener. Someone who will sit parallel to me like a tamed dog, saying nothing in response but sedating effect in return. Garbage has been piling up for long, dust has been settling for far too long, maybe this attic in my head need dusting and trouncing. Guess I need to shed my leaves, like that almond tree which I see everyday, stand denuded for a while and then stack it all again.

Many conversations I've had 

in my life's parade 

I was hanging like a portrait 

on some wall, hearing all 

saying nothing

in response.

Mussitations, they say a lot 

everyday, as a junkie smoking pot

heard stories inside stories

song stuffed in a song 

saying too little

in response.

I can handle it all 

filtered well through my firewall

systems are far from perfect 

they always are

sanity breached

in response. 

I hear a shrill cry

from echelons in my head flies

cache of thoughts, floating up above

in sky, only to simmer down

plunge out 

in response.

Clutter when heaps up 

it needs a dump

disclosure is all I seek 

for a closure

saying out loud 

in response. 

“My idea of good company...is the company of clever, well-informed people, who have a great deal of conversation; that is what I call good company.'
'You are mistaken,' said he gently, 'that is not good company, that is the best.”
― Jane Austen
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